Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul
And sings the tune without the words, and never stops at all
And sweetest is the gale is heard; and sore must be the storm
That could abash the little bird
That kept so many warm...
~Emily Dickinson

Friday, January 22, 2016

notes to myself

If ever I get lost beyond my own perception for whatever reason I want these notes to remind me how I feel about my journey so far...

* Most of the time as a mother we don't have choices. You made the choice to be a mother, so anything after the fact is now your job. Have fun with it and always learn from your kids.

* Patience. Structure. Love. These 3 things are what I NEED to raise my child with Autism. Repeat it over and over if necessary.

* Find your balance every day. Simplify things so that you can do so. Make mental or physical notes of moments that make your heart smile...then remember these moments to help ground you when you are feeling lost.

* Don't forget your passions. Remember you are still your own being. Don't live entirely through or for your child. Live for yourself and your loves too...keep that balance within you, I promise it will make you happier.

* Get comfortable with being uncomfortable. Seriously things get messy and awkward so you better just settle in and embrace it.

* See past the physical. Look inside and hear what the heart is saying...I've had to learn to talk to Kannon's heart because he doesn't have the words most of the time. Know that his mind is full of chaos and that he's just trying to figure it out. Know his heart and how full it is. Talk to his heart.

* Don't be afraid to show your vulnerable to your kids. You are not perfect and you don't want your kids to think perfection is a goal...weakness can be a blessing, a learning tool, show this to you kids. Say I'm sorry...Say thank you...it's o.k to treat your kids as equals in the arena of respect. They deserve it just as much as you do.

* Laugh at yourself. Seriously you've got years of mess ups coming your way...laugh it off and move on.

* Remember your arenas in life: Mother. Disciplinarian. Friend. Advocate. Audience. Student.
Take on all these arenas as if my life depends on it...because ironically it does.

* Be kind. Be compassionate. Be open to new experiences and opinions. You are not always right so don't be stubborn enough to chase people away...listen and learn always.

* Be gracious. Gratitude is the best gift you can give your soul. It is the result of a life lesson. Good or bad be grateful for it....and take gratitude day by day, it is not meant to be rushed.

* If you love or appreciate someone, tell them. You truly never know time lines or circumstances. It just might make all the difference in both of your worlds.

* If you ever have the opportunity to say goodbye to someone, do it. Give your heart that gift. Even if you see them tomorrow, give yourself moments of opportunity.

 That's all for now...