Be the change you want to see in the world...

Sounds simple enough.
It is.

Make the choice to see the good in people.
Take a moment to think before you speak.
If you don't feel good about whatever it is you are about to say, then don't say it.
Let your emotions help you.
They are there for a reason...to guide you, help you, aide you in staying on the right path in life.

I find myself sometimes feeling as if I am outside myself looking in.
Watching people watch me...watching Kannon and his "quirks"
I am constantly introspectively guiding my thoughts, words, and actions.

This is all because I want to change people's perspectives...including my own.
Kannon is teaching me patience, love, and a whole new world I never knew possible.
Even if only one person sees my emotional discipline...sees my eyes watching them watch me...sees that I am dedicated to my cause, to my son...then it is worth it all.
Even if I have to blindly believe in my own cause, it is still worth it.

I have many moments during my day that I go above and beyond the "norm"
Good for me.
I don't need a pat on the back, I don't need praise or applause...I just need my soul to feed on the action itself.
I need to do my own work.
For someday it will just come naturally...someday the work will just be...will transform into self.
This is also not why I write about these moments. I write to hopefully raise awareness and hope to situations some may not understand.

This is what I strive for.
Understanding. Hope. Love.
Moment by moment I strive for hope that I can pass through my heart into my children's without hesitation...without pause.
For after learning that I can trust myself...my actions...my truth, then I will know I am of pure intention.

I want people to like other people.
To pause and think before they speak.
To watch before they pass judgement...hell, to not pass any judgement at all.
Just to observe, know and find peace with it...

Take it or leave it, it is a choice.
But don't judge or speak ill against another whom you don't understand.

And, if you find yourself on the other side of this...
Let it go.
Don't allow others to affect your path.
Do not feel that their opinions or judgement is worthy of your time, worry, or contemplation.

I am not lecturing.
I am not trying to enlighten or speak as I know it all.

I am simply speaking from my heart, my experiences, and my hopes for a better tomorrow for us all...
Not just my son.
For everyone.

I watch Kannon draw pictures every day of Rainbows, Sunshine, Smiles...
It is within us all.

No matter how "damaged" we may or may not be.

I have seen Kannon pushed 15 feet from a playground, called "retarded" to his face, "stupid", "weird", I have seen kids laugh at him and run away from him, I have seen adults frown at him and shake their head in disapproval...

I have watched all of this happen to my child.
I have watched...and I am learning.

Kannon has taught me through example just how to be that change I want to see...
He is still laughing, still trying to play with kids who make fun of him, still smiling through the tears.

This is strength.
This is love of life.


peace.