Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul
And sings the tune without the words, and never stops at all
And sweetest is the gale is heard; and sore must be the storm
That could abash the little bird
That kept so many warm...
~Emily Dickinson

Sunday, August 14, 2011

Breaking through...and putting it back together.

You just never know when things will come together...or for that matter fall apart.

I sat here this afternoon while the kids were settling down after a long afternoon of running around...the beach...a long hike during low tide checking out all the sea creatures thriving...it was awesome :)
Kannon was magnificent today.
He explored things, he observed and he truly just enjoyed being outside in nature.
He was calmer than usual and I even caught him closing his eyes raising his head up to the sky and just soaking it all in...I wish I had my camera to capture the moment...but it is an image that will forever be seared in my mind.
My beautiful boy, calm and serene...raising his head to the sky and enjoying life.
He picked up many rocks, sticks and watched in delight as crabs scurried across the rocks when we would approach them.
It was a great day.

Back to my original thought...
As I watched the kids wind down from the beach I saw Kannon walk over to his books and grab one.
He picked it up, walked over to our friend who is visiting us for the weekend and sit down next to him.
He opened the book up and a miracle happened.
He literally started to "read" line by line the book, 5 Little Monkeys.

"5 Little Monkeys jumping on the bed, one fell off and bumped his head, mommy called the doctor and the doctor said...NO MORE MONKEYS JUMPING ON THE BED"...
All the way down to 1 Little Monkey.
Clear as ever.
Articulated to perfection.

My eyes teared up with every verse...
I had to tuck myself back into the kitchen so I could listen without him seeing the tears run down my face in pride.
It was the clearest I have EVER heard Kannon talk in the past 7 years...it was as if he had never had a problem with language.
It was...well, it made my knees weak to be honest.
I have never heard my son speak so clear.
I have never heard his precious voice come through him like that.
It is hard to put into words, but it is like hearing someones voice for the first time.
I mean really hearing them...hearing their true voice.
Not the Disney movie lines pouring through him...not the verbal ticks...none of that.

It was heart bending.
I felt at that moment my son was breaking through to himself.
He had actually made it through.
He was talking.
He was clearly articulating words.

Sometimes things come together.
Sometimes all the hard work comes together in a head on collision at the most unsuspecting moments.
All the therapy...hours and hours and hours of it...shining through in this brief moment.

Today I got a rare glimpse into the potential Kannon truly has.
The true person he is under it all.
Under all this....Autism.

Under it all he is there.

Then, an hour later he was back into Autism world.
He was back into a confusion of Disney movie words and phrases...he had lost his clarity.
"Mamma...Look...Mamma...Are you serious...Crabby Patty...Crabby Patty...Mamma...Look"

At least I had that moment.

I will never forget it.
And I will not let Autism forget about it either.
I know better.

peace :)

1 comment:

  1. I have goosebumps all over right now!!! :-))) and i agree, don't you let Autism forget about this...ever. Biggest Hugs!!!